Sentimental, and other words to describe me.

If there is one single thing to know about me, it is that I am SENTIMENTAL. I think that is something I developed from reading; being immersed in these fantastical tales and fictional places makes me so desperate for ways to hold on to my life and memories forever. I dream of showing my children the momentos of my life and them appreciating it the same way I do when my grandma shows me her wedding pictures, or wears a beautiful bracelet my grandfather got her 50 years ago.

The jewelry I wear is pretty much all culminated from family. The necklace I wear every day has a cross and a saint on it that was gifted to my sister for her baptism and is engraved with the date on it (I stole this from her closet when she was in college). The third charm on it is an Italian cornicello, my father's, which was given to him by my grandpa Poppy, and so on. The bracelet I wear every day is a bangle that my grandma wore. The sound of it clanking against other bracelets is so ingrained in my head that every time I hear it on my own wrist, I think of Nanny and our time in the kitchen or her rubbing my back to sleep at night.

The loss of my grandmother this past summer has made me more sentimental than I have ever been. When I was younger, I used to keep movie tickets, sugar packets, maps, and any other momento I thought would hold weight in future years when I saw it. I never did anything with them, but now that one of the biggest pieces of my life is gone, I have appreciated my sentimentality and those trinkets so much more. There is something so special about having a movie ticket that sparks a memory of a great day spent with family, or a jewelry box that always sat on the dresser in your childhood bedroom.

Other ways I show my sentimentality is through gifts. My love language is gift-giving 100%. I'm the type of person that buys a gift just because it reminds me of you, and I will give it to you for no reason. One of the most sentimental gifts I have given, I think, is a hand-painted banner. In my freshman year, I painted the banners for my sorority, and we were having our spring parent's weekend. My parents couldn't come up because they were coming up the next weekend to move me out of my apartment, so instead, my grandparents came. I am lucky enough to have had four grandparents growing up, both parents of my parents. That weekend, my mom's parents, Nanny and Grandpa, were coming up and acting as my parents for the weekend. When I was figuring out what to put on the banner, I thought I wanted to do something nice for my grandparents since they do SO much for me. I took an old baby photo we had of them each holding my hand while walking and painted it on the banner. I also included "we do love you," the words they signed each and every card with. They loved it, and so did everyone else in my sorority. It's times like that where I love to be sentimental. Bringing joy and reminding people of the love that is experienced in life is such a fulfilling thing. That was one of the last trips my grandma ever took before her dementia got bad. Introducing them to my friends and parading them around like royals was a special experience. My friends fell in love and everyone in ADPi knows who Hammy is. Sharing such an important piece of my life with the women who would become my forever friends is something I am so grateful for.

Since losing my grandmother, I have gone through every single thing she owned. Now I have a lot of the jewelry she used to wear, some of her fabulous purses and outfits, among other things. I now wear some of her jewelry every day, and it makes my heart so warm to be able to show my love for her through her fashion (heart sparkle for sure). It is truly the world's BIGGEST compliment when my friends ask where her pieces are from; it makes me feel like she's still with me. Losing my grandma, Nanny, as I called her, is one of the hardest things I have dealt with in my 20s. There's something about not being able to see her or know that she is still here that is so hard to cope with. My grief comes in waves, and it's so hard to understand and deal with. She was everything I want to be and a beautiful role model. Every day brings new challenges and grief I never thought I held, but I am so happy to have pieces of her with me. I know when I turn the radio on to 1950's country and roll the windows down, she's with me. Every time I throw a dinner party, she's right beside me, guiding me through her recipes.

My sentimentality goes beyond those little tickets and material items, but honoring traditions and the women that made me who I am in all that I do. Sharing pieces of my life, and the relationships I have with Nanny, my mom, sister, my other grandma, etc. are what bring me so much joy. I love having my heart on my sleeve, and showing the things that make me happy through my fashion, just as my grandma would have done. My vulnerability is something I cherish and am not ashamed of.

So, to sum all this up, I love being sentimental; it is one of my favorite things about myself. Celebrating life, milestones, and people is always going to be something I appreciate in myself and others. I don't know all the words that describe me, but I know sentimental will always be one of them. I challenge everyone to be sentimental and show the people you love that you love them.

And with that being said...If you have any recommendations for some books that give you this feeling, please hit a girl up.